WDM. IA - Who Wants a Colonoscopy?

I also stopped to get my blood pressure read at one of those small machines in pharmacies and pharmacy departments in grocery stores. I sat down, put the cuff on, closed my eyes and thought of palm trees wafting in the breeze, ocean waves lapping the shore and a good novel.

‘Nate, get in that cart!’

‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’

‘Emily, you get in that cart too!’

‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’

‘Right now!!!’

‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’ ‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’

‘Or else!!!’

‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’ ‘W - a - a - a - a - h!’

Holy Toledo, it was Mr. and Mrs. Screamin’ Meemie and their two little screamers.

I think my blood pressure is 505 over 160. Well, that was that for that blood pressure reading. Actually, I just smiled, started again and was back at the beach.


Errand time. We leave in about two weeks and we are wrapping up some things and getting last minute items bought.

                                        Gary                        Nancy

Annual Physicals                Check                Check

Eye Exams                        Check                Check

Dental Exams (April)        Check                Check

Dental Exams (Sept)        Check                Check

Flu Shots                                Check                Check

Mammogram (N)                                        Check

Skin exam (G)                        Check

Looks like we’re singlehandedly keeping the doctors in business around here. But, we’ve completed all our exams except for my colonoscopy. I asked my doctor in June and she asked the colonoscopy office. They never called me. I asked again in August but, when tthey finally called me, they had no openings until after we had left. Shucks. And, I mean that, truly. I am due for a colonoscopy but will have to wait until next summer now. I am on a waiting list and maybe they will surprise me with a call sometime in the next two weeks but I’m not counting on it.

Meanwhile I’m going to get a colonoscopy by proxy and send my brother, who, at 60, has never had one. I’m thinking this will be a great present for him to remember us by over the time we’re gone.

I called his doctor to find out how much it would cost. He referred me to the colonoscopy doctor whose receptionist told me $880 - $1100 (give my brother the whole $1100, I thought.) I suppose the difference depends upon the length of the tube. However, she told me that there would also be a cost for the hospital and the anesthesiologist (if you can spell that without looking, you get one free). So, how does one find out the price of a colonoscopy? They do not make it easy in American medicine to be a good consumer.

        a. it’s difficult to get any prices

        b. it’s difficult to get a Consumer’s Report on quality of the doctor, the hospital and the anesthesiologist. Although this is getting much better these days. You can even type ‘anesthesiologist Fort Dodge, Ia reviews’ into Google and get reviews.

It’s easier to be a good consumer buying a camera than buying a ‘procedure.’ And this is a proceure which I can ‘order’ in advance. Imagine trying to ‘order’ an operation? And, why is that? Which is more important?

Meanwhile a friend of mine sent me a column by Dave Barry about colonocopies. Gary and I laughed so hard that we almost choked on our Crystal Lite.

I cannot print this here since it is copyrighted material but - you can find this by typing ‘colonoscopy journal’ into Google. Do this - but be sitting down with nothing in your mouth.