WDM, IA - 'What We've Got Here is a Failure to Communicate'

As we were getting ready for bed last night it occurred to us that when we were speaking with Jack on the phone about his visit, we might have miscommunicated the day that he was supposed to come. Since Gary is leaving Monday morning for Fort Dodge to work with Lug on his new computer and not returning until Tuesday evening, we thought Jack could come early Tuesday, we would go bike riding Tuesday afternoon and, after Gary returned, we could go to the Iowa State Fair on Wednesday. Well, anyway, that was the plan. Did we give the wrong days to Jack?

So, early Monday morning, I called Jack to see what his interpretation was - sure enough, he was already packed, gassing up his truck and on his way to Des Moines. Oops. Now, what? How am I going to entertain him for 2 days? O - K now. How about a bike ride?

Let me tell you a bit about Jack. He actually used to be a bit of a hell-raiser. Well, to be more precise, he was a huge hell-raiser. But somehow a few years ago, he saw the light, gave up the drinking, the drugs, and the fried foods and began exercising and eating lots of vegetables. Who knows why? Even he doesn't know how the switch was flipped. Were we excited? We were ecstatic. These days, his drug of choice is exercise: he rides a stationary bike about 110 miles per day, rides about 20 miles per day on a regular Trek bike on trails in Fort Dodge, does countless sit-ups, push-ups and other various exercises all while nibbling on yogurt, broccoli, salads and - ice cream. Well, can’t he still have a vice? Better ice cream than other vices.

Now Gary and I are not regular bike riders, we prefer to walk: load-bearing exercise. But we do have bikes and so Jack and I got them out and headed on down the trails in Des Moines. Marvelous weather, a great trail system and we were having fun. I told Jack that I couldn’t ever ride with him so told him to go ahead of me, circle back, go behind be and circle back up. I figured this way, we’d still be mostly together but I wouldn’t hold him back.

We took the trail to the library to return a book, we headed on down the next trail to bike near the river, then we headed further afield. But, finally my buns and my thighs screamed that it was high time to turn around. In fact, they were probably screaming this several miles ago but I successfully ignored them. But I couldn’t do this any more but I had an ace up my sleeve. I knew where there was a Hy-Vee grocery store, right on the way home, which had those little single serve ice cream containers.

Whew. Just in time. I was falling further and further back of my little brother. Oh, no. I need sugar. Nice treat and we headed on home. I knew there was a hill (in my current condition it was a monster hill but it was really just a slope) and I had been trying to figure out a route to avoid this. However, every other route also involved a ‘hill’ so we continued on. And there it was - insurmountable - almost. Finally, near the top I was in first gear and first gear, the lowest I could go. But, I made it up. Jack, of course, had powered up, coasted back down and was powering up again.

I was happy that I was still on the bike at the top of the ‘hill’.

From them on, it was a downhill coast to home and our friendly garage. Oof-da.

Showers, dinner and a trip out to Costco for his broccoli. Costco has broccoli bags that hold 3, count them - 3 pounds of broccoli. He’ll eat that in a week - it’s his favorite vegetable. So says the guy who used to hide vegetables around the bottom of his plate when he was a boy. When I cleared his plate after dinner, I knew I’d find a perfect ring of vegetables marking the spot. Well, it actually wasn’t that bad but he fought tooth and nail against eating vegetables. My parents would be so proud of him today. 

Back home, some conversation (bonding) and the day was done.